Have you experienced an emotional release?
Almost every massage therapist, and probably every myofascial release therapist, has experienced it. While working with a client you find an area that feels . . . different. Then, the client has an emotional release. They may start crying, laughing, screaming. The emotional release may bring back flashbacks, memories, or visions they forgot they had or have never experienced before.
If you are not a body worker, the concept probably sounds like some hippie mumbo-jumbo. However, as a bodyworker myself, I see to many emotional releases from people who had never even heard of the concept. I never told them they might experience an emotional release. They do not know what an emotional release is. Yet, they end up crying on the table.
What is an emotional release?
Debate exists about what these releases are. Psychologists especially get nervous about a bodyworker’s role during these emotional releases. The concern has its merits. People can create false memories in these vulnerable, emotional states. Bodyworkers do have a history of encouraging fake memories. In addition, treatments like birth recreations in particular can create false memories. This can lead to increased emotional damage instead of emotional resolution.
For a massage client, this information may all sound new and controversial. Emotional releases, though, can provide therapeutic value if done correctly. This article gives tools for both the client and the bodyworker to help navigate these experiences. Experiencing an emotional release feels incredibly vulnerable. If you experience one with your bodyworker, you probably already have built up a certain about of trust for your therapist. This positive sign means the emotional release will likely have good ramifications.
Here’s what your bodyworker should provide for you:
- Your bodyworker should support you, allowing you to experience the emotion without judgement or analysis.
- They should give the power to you during this experience. You should always have the right to end the session, stop working in that area, or continue based on what you want. You are in an incredibly vulnerable state and should havethe power over what happens during the session.
- They should not give you advice, tell you what it means, ask you if a certain event happened, or tell you what you to feel.
- They should not abandon you. On the other side of forcing you through an emotion, they should also not avoid the emotion. Some massage therapists feel insecure around emotions and may not know what to do when you experience them. This may lead to the therapist either stopping the massageabruptly, telling you to stop feeling, or even giving off a vibe of judgement. These responses do not provide what you need in your vulnerable state.
- They should give you permission to share your experience or not share it, depending on what you prefer.
- Statement like, “it’s okay to feel,” or “you have permission to feel what is happening.” are appropriate. Statements like “Did something happen to you?” or “Are you feeling _____.” are not appropriate.
- Sometimes an emotional release comes and goes. Most clients report feeling relieved and lighter after one. If that happens for you: great. If instead, it brings something up for you, you may decide to see a counsellor. You can also continue with bodywork during this time. This decision varies from person to person.
- Developing the skill of feeling your mind and body can assist you through an emotional release. Practice self-compassion: Watch Kristen Neff’s TED talk on self-compassion: Practice vulnerability: “Rising Strong” and “Daring Greatly” by Brene Brown help develop tools to work through emotions, feelings, and sensations. You can read them on your own time and integrate it into your life.
For the bodyworker:
- You should remain unattached but supportive. You should allow the emotion to come up without judgement. On the other hand, you should allow the client to experience the emotion without getting caught up in it yourself.
- You should keep your hands on the client, only moving them if asked: moving your hands can feel like abandonment at this vulnerable time.
- You too should practice self-compassion and vulnerability regularly. The better you develop this skill, the more comfortable you will be with other’s emotions. While you should not advise the client, you do need to support them through the process.
- Allow them to choose what they need from the session and emotional release. They may feel great afterwards: like a brick has been lifted from their back. They may feel like something came up for them that they need to work on. This is their journey. They need to choose the next steps. You may advise they seek counselling or assure them they can continue with bodywork safely, but don’t force an experience on them that may not be there.
- Create a space for them to work through the emotion. The emotion is theirs, not yours. Let them process through it the way they need to process.
- Stay grounded: keep your feet on the floor and image your feet sinking into it. You can also image roots growing down through the earth or energy flowing down to the earth. These exercises help keep you from getting wrapped up in the client’s emotions.